Get Your Holiday On!

Happy Thanksgiving folks.

Isn't this Turkey precious? I made this. Cheesy yes? Do I love it? Yes.

I m not a super big fan of Turkey Day. I would much rather have 2 Christmas's. I just adore the Christmas Season a whole stinken bunch.

I do like Thanksgiving for several reasons. It's a day we can walk around, and b thankful for EVERYTHING that we wanted to be thankful for.

So here fella blogger's.. This is what I am thankful for: God, Family, Friends, My best friends, cousins, my puppies, safe neighborhood, ability to love, life, small memories, vacations, sunshine, lighting bugs, reality shows, little children, LIFE.

Now I am so excited for Christmas. Soooooooooo excited. December means annoying Christmas commercials, which I adore, christmas lights, peppermint hot chocolate, Pumpkin and Cinnamon everything, going to Vegas, Seeing my best friend for a week, wearing a red dress and antlers, a month off school, relaxing, listening to Justin Bieber's Christmas music all night, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and the awesome sales after Christmas. Happy Holidays everyone!!

"You say what???"

Im alive children. My stressful week did not beat me. Thank the great big heavens.

Every day brings me new surprises. When I thought about posting this post/topic, I was so unsure. The only reason I am talking about this post is because, IF someone reads this, I want them to know everything is possible. 

This week I was offered 2 modeling jobs, and 1 acting job. I have never ever ever pondered/thought about anything like this before. Sure I am addicted to taking pictures with friends and capturing memories..But come on life; this is nuts. The agencies approached me out of no where, and honestly I thought it was a joke.

If I had to be honest with myself, and the world...2 years ago I was so overweight. I was the "overweight girl" that had 0 confidence. I had very little friends, and always doubted myself. I knew I was overweight, but food was the only thing that brought me happiness. Food was my friends. Food did not ever tell me I was fat. Food was there for me no matter what. Over the last year, I have tried so hard to be the fittest person I could be. I was tired of having no confidence, I was tired of being the biggest girl in my classes. I choose to loose weight. I had no idea how hard it would be. I had no idea even how? But I knew that I wanted it. 

Last year, I would have had no idea I would be offered these jobs. These opportunities are amazing in my eyes. Unfortunately, I turned them down. They required me to do this when I was in school. This gives me the encouragement. Encouragement to continue going to the gym diligently. I know I can accomplish anything.

Humbled.

Lately I haven't been the Happiest Camper of life. I thought I had a lot of "reasons" to be a downer. This last week, I have had the worst mood, so many trials. One after the other. I'm used to trials. I have had them all my life. This week I was unhappy. Unhappy with basically everything.

Ive been sick of people judging me. I usually blow it off, but recently I just thought enough is enough. I live my life the best I can...and here people who walk into my life just judge me? I was sick, of being the nice girl. I was sick of studying. I was sick of being tired. I have been praying a lot lately. Praying, just to be "content"...I know it won't just happen over night. But, I believe it will happen. I love the power of prayer. I love believing, trusting, and having faith.

kinda new subject.

I miss Missouri. More then I tell. Before I moved I was so content with my friends. Sure, they did bad things all the time, but I had a looot of true friends. Yes, I have lots of friends that I love so much now. I have had so many wonderful opportunities to make friends this last year. Sadly, I have not taken advantage of this. Believing, I will never find "true friends" that will make my day like my old friends used to. I have come to a realization that I need to give people a chance.

Speaking about friends. Ive realized how blessed I am to have friends. I made a good friend today...:) He made me feel special and laugh. After a stressful week, I needed that.  I have a feeling this friendship will gain..

Everything has a learning lesson. This week...although it was terribly hard for me. Although I didn't handle myself like I should of, although I hurt some people that were close to me, I am humbled. I am humbled to know that challenges make me stronger. Sometimes, I try not to believe it... But I can't loose faith.

I am humbled.

Haaay.

This week has ben one of those "bleh" weeks. Wrong situations, has just been flowing in my direction. Day after day of swatting those situations away, it gets to the point it just needs to stop. Today, did it stop? No..  Today was hard for me. I am feeling it, today. People can handle a certain amount of stress, and this week has been the definition of extreme stress. With all that said, I am grateful. I am grateful for the people that have been put in my life. I can be myself. That is an amazing feeling, knowing you can         
Thanks guys. Thanks for being great friends to me tonight.
                                        relax, let your hair down, take a breath, and laugh.


           On another note. I hate school.     

Fearful, exciting awakening.

BeWaRe PaLs:

There are so many thoughts in my head right now.

Let me begin by this.

My week has been rather insane. By insane I mean: pressuring, scary,intense, terrifying, learning, special, and hard. I do not know where to begin, so good luck understanding.

     My week was really hard for me. At the beginning of the week, I had a "scary moment" going on. I was scared for my own safety this week. I am a huge scraredy cat the way it is, so a real "scary" event, popping up in my life...really took a tole on me. With the comfort of Heavenly Father, I am feeling at peace, and I am grateful.Since the semester is nearing.. my professors have all gotten together and planned together, to give me the most amount of homework that they possibly can.Okay, I am sure they really haven't all gotton together, but HECK it sure feels like it. I have had more tests this week, homework, papers, and whatevertheheck else, then I have evereverever had. Well, I finally submitted my human development paper that was worth 50% of my grade. I'm feeling really good about this. Crossing my fingers here. I just wrote a 9 page paper on "what is your philosophy on life? Where do you see your self in 10 years from now and 20 years?" Weeeeel heeeeey there tough question. Any way, I finally finished this paper. I have never thought about things  (Why you ask? Because my English teacher gives me a 15 minutes lecture every time I use the word "things", so I am practicing OKaY?) this deep before.Soo here is my thoughts on this topic, and life:

-Life is precious, it really truly is. 

-Be proud of who you are, you don't have to be a size 2, you don't have to act  a certain way, talk a certain way. Accept yourself.

-Be thankful. Take time out. Thank God.

-Embrace your future. Try not to be scared. Everything happends for a reason.  

-People are put in your life for a reason. Your put in people's life for a purpose also.

This week has been so stressful, I have been at school from 9am-7pm every night. Then I get home at 9, then go to the gym from 9-10. from 10pm- 4am, I study. Then I sleep for 2.5 hours, and wake up to work out... then repeat. I have been GOGOGO. Today on the way to my Ogden the song "What if God was One of us" by Joan Osborne. It just really hits home. It makes you think. It makes you face reality. No need to mention I have listened to this song a good 85 times tonight.

http://youtu.be/UYZKZfdr3ac

Thats the link, I'm not sure how well I like the video but I adore the lyrics. If the youtube link doesn't work, make sure you look it up.

So there is my ranting for the night, Be happy.Love yourself. Accept yourself. Choose to love yourself, and choose to be happy.

Angel.

See this girl.

Is she precious?  Yes.

Do I know her?  No.

Do I feel like a freak uploading a random little girl on my blog? Kinda.

I was at school today. I was not a happy camper. I have had so much that has been on my mind lately, and I just have been stressed. Tuesdays, I only have my delightful math class. I go just because attendance is a big part of my grade. If attendance did not count, I would never show up. Ew. So I go all ugly to my math class, I wake up 5 minutes before I have to leave, then drive an hour, to sit in a class for 45 minutes, then drive home. Now, understand why I hate it? 

Okay thanks.

Blaaaah. 

Anyway, today I was walking in the hall, and a little girl with down syndrome came running up to me and gave me a high five. Then she yelled "huuuuug" (mind you very loud) and I may or may not have laughed when her mom told her to be quiet. But were  besides the point, of me encouraging this little girl to yell. 

All I have to say is bless this little girl. Bless her heart. This little girl, did not know me. Although this little girl made my DAY. She goes through discrimination,judging, and criticism every day. But she smiles, and laughs. I love this little girl. So much. 

She was an angel.

<3

On another note. I am getting sick of everyone bashing on my favorite holiday. I love me some CHRISTMAS. Everyday I hear people hating on my holiday, I mean foreal children? I mean I know, thanksgiving is close to Christmas...and all. Yes, I love Thanksgiving. But, I love my Christmas better. 

I have made me some big Turkey day plans. Wanna know some of my plans!!

Heres what I am thinking.

-I will dress up as an indian.

-I will trace my hand and make a turkey.

-I will make a feather bandana.

-I will eat corn on the cob and mash potatoes, while watching a "Thanksgiving movie" Is there even such thing?

and...

then..

there...

is...

BLACK FRIDAAAY.

<3

Get your groove on.

I wish I could love this machine, I really wish I could.

Tonight this stupid machine kicked my butt. I'm "trying" to get in shape again.. It's so so so hard, forcing myself to keep running on that elliptical, when your EXHAUSTED.

These couple of weeks have been hectic. Very hectic, scary, and stressful. Challenges make you stronger right? I'm sure hoping.