On the Twelfth day left of School...

Twelve More Days Left..Twelve.. 

On the twelfth day left of school...I blog.

:)

In exactly 12 days I will be done with my first year of college. Well Almost, then finals..But still. I'm finally seeing that darn "light at the end of the tunnel". I remember all my life, thinking about how people that go to college are always so OLD. Since, August I feel like I have grown up just beyond I ever thought I could. As much as I hated waking up in the mornings, hated studying all day everyday, hated driving to school, and parking miles away...I'm glad I did it.

          In January when I got sick, and got a little behind in everything,( since I just laid on the couch for literately 2 months, feeling so sick!) I feel as if I have been going and going, just to try to catch up with everything. Catching up in math. Catching up with activities I have missed, and catching up with friends,and family. I lost basically 2 months of my life, that I can't just let happen:) Well from February until now, I have been somehow trudging through school, taking classes I hate, and doing all this school stuff.

       All my life I wanted to be a teacher. I think partially it was because my brother is basically my age, and all my cousins are like a year younger then me. So I never really was around little kids, which I love. So when people asked me "What do you want to do when you grow up?" I would always say "teacher."  Once I became a preschool teacher, I KNEW I wanted to work with kids. The last couple of months, when people would ask me the same question.. and I would reply "Teacher." I just wasn't feeling it. I wasn't sure if I REALLY wanted to do that or if I was just sticking to the answer I have always told everyone.

(This is back when I taught preschool, I sure miss these cute smart kids!)

It's been so irritating/stressful, going to school recently, and just not knowing what I want to do. Not knowing what I should major in. Recently, I have bee praying that I would know what to do. Well what do you know? I was given the opportunity to volunteer with some friends at a Center for grieving children, but unfortunately I declined it, because I was so overwhelmed with school. I didn't think much of it at the time.

A week later, some students in my class at school, and I had to go volunteer for an assignment for 10 hours. So I heard about the Boys and Girls Club After school Programs.  Well today, was the last day there.. To tell you the truth, I was thrilled about it. The kids were CRAZY. 

....

Well, today even though the kids were crazy, even though I got boogers and grossness all over me, and even though hands and feet were going down my pants and shirt... I know that at this point in my life, that I should keep pursuing the classes, and everything in the teaching department. I have been so humbled going to the school, hearing about these childrens stories, hearing about there "terrible" home life...and especially hearing them tell me that their parents tell them that they arn't smart enough to go to college. My heart was overwhelmed. Hearing that proved to me, the reason I wanted to be a teacher in the first place.

I was pretty much the minority...

The girl in the black and red was so attached to me it was insane. When I told her it was my last day, she cried for a good hour. I'm going to miss these little girls, they have such a bright future ahead of them no matter what their parents tell them. One of the girls, begged me to come back every week, and teach her to do her math so she can pass 2nd grade since her parents won't help...

Thinking back, when I was offered the opportunity to go to the Center for grieving children, I know that was Gods way in answering my prayers, showing me how much I love children. I am so thankful, this opportunity came up again, and I could go to the Boys and Girls Club. It's crazy, after spending 10 hours with these girls it was AWFUL just AWFUL for me to tell them bye...

Almost as hard as this day...Telling my preschoolers bye..I absolutly hate telling all these kids bye.

 

BUuUuT. On a happy note of all this..

Aaaaaloooong time from now, when I am a mommy. I won't ever have to  stop, and tell them "BYE" for ever. I am so so so so grateful for eternal families, knowing that one day when I have cute little kids, I won't have to tell them bye after 2 years, like my preschoolers. I won't have to tell them bye after 10 hours, like my Boys and Girls Club kids. I won't even have to tell them Bye, at the end of our lives...Why? Because of Eternal Families. I am so grateful God placed the idea of "going to the Boys and Girls Club" in my head.. I'm so glad I have reassurance..:)

Twelve More Days Left..Twelve..